I have always wanted to prove myself a selfless guy. It made me feel great and appreciated. Even the slightest bit of selflessness would make me so proud and happy about myself. Then I realized if it made me feel so happy, what was so selfless about it? The fact is there is nothing called “selfless” in the whole universe. We do things that we like and make our own choices that may seem hard and painful sometimes but the satisfaction they give us is what makes them no more selfless.
Now all this discussion with myself confused me. Why exactly do we want to prove that we are not selfish? And why does others’ opinion about us matter to us so much? Can’t we be selfish in our own beautiful way and be happy about it? This whole post may seem absurd up to this point because the question remains where exactly am I going with this?
Just for a moment, try to feel as if you are okay with being selfish. Even when you do something entirely for someone else, you only hold on to the fact that you did that only because it made you happy about yourself or it boosted up your self-esteem or any other reason that is purely selfish. When I started to feel this way myself, I felt a huge burden lifted off my chest. I was suddenly exempted from so many responsibilities at once.
First of all, I don’t have to prove my goodness to anybody. I can be who I really want to be. Secondly, I don’t find myself bragging about all those so-called selfless deeds I have done for others. I just don’t have to explain any aspect of what I have done to anybody. Third, for probably the first time in my life, I feel so happy about myself because I value myself the most. And when you value someone, you will leave no chance to make him/her feel special; so in this case, I am the one feeling special and that too only because of me without needing anybody else to do that for me.
Also, when somebody thanks you for your help and you say don’t mention it, you actually mean it this time because you know you don’t need to be thanked. I can keep writing all day about a number of advantages of being okay with being selfish but I guess you already got my point.
The reason I wrote this post is that without us realizing about it, we really give people around us a hard time by just bragging about our goodness and selflessness. Believe me, nobody wants to know how good you are in your own words. Just try to remember the moment you were on the receiving end of this the last time. I am sure you would have felt tortured. So it is important that we don’t give the same treatment to others. If you have to brag about it so much, you better don’t do it at all; believe me, people won’t mind so much.
This will not only make you tolerable but likable as well. A wise man has once said, “Speak only when your words are better than your silence.” So stop bragging falsely about how selfless you are and just accept that you are as selfish as anybody else and be happy about it.
In the end, for myself, I’d like to say that I have only written this post to get people’s attention. Well, who doesn’t love to get attention? So it’s just Selfish Me!