Sachin Sharma

Tag: Mental Health

  • The True Meaning of Helping: Why Seeking Gratitude Shouldn’t Be the Goal

    The True Meaning of Helping: Why Seeking Gratitude Shouldn’t Be the Goal

    It’s natural to have a desire to be a hero and help those in need. Whether it’s lending a hand to a friend in need or volunteering in the community, helping others is a way to make a difference and feel good about oneself. However, the reality of helping is not always as simple as it seems.

    It’s no secret that help is rarely unconditional and selfless. There is always some underlying motive, even if it’s just the desire to be someone’s hero. But in our quest to be heroes, we often forget one important rule – to leave as soon as the job is done.

    While it can be tempting to stick around and listen to words of gratitude and appreciation, especially from a stranger, this can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it can boost our self-esteem and make us feel worthwhile. On the other hand, it can also create false expectations and misconceptions about our true character.

    When we help someone, we become the source of their happiness and they are often full of praises for us. But the problem is that these praises are based solely on our one act of kindness. Deep down, we know that this is not an accurate reflection of our entire personality. Just imagine if someone judged your entire character based on one mistake – you wouldn’t like it, right?

    Unfortunately, the person we are helping is also making the same mistake. They are viewing us through a narrow lens based on that one good deed, and it’s easy to become caught up in that perception. But living in this delusion for too long can have consequences.

    We may be able to maintain this “good image” for a while by exhibiting a pattern of helpful behavior, but because it’s not our true self, we are bound to break the pattern at some point. And when we do, even if it’s just a small mistake, the other person may not be able to accept it because we were supposed to be their hero. This small mistake can trigger a chain reaction of mistakes in their eyes, and before we know it, we have broken expectations, promises, or even someone’s heart.

    The solution is simple – leave as soon as our help is no longer needed. This will not only save us from the embarrassment of breaking the illusion, but it will also allow the beneficiary of our help to hold onto the gratitude for longer. And, as a rule of thumb, good deeds are forgotten faster than mistakes, so there’s no point dwelling on them for too long.

    The next time you have the opportunity to help someone, remember to play it safe and leave as soon as the job is done – just like a superhero! But more importantly, remember that the true meaning of helping is not about seeking gratitude or recognition. It’s about making a difference and being there for others, without any expectations or ulterior motives.

    The satisfaction of making a positive impact on someone’s life is reward enough. And even if it goes unnoticed, that doesn’t diminish the impact you made. So, go ahead and help others, but do it for the right reasons. Be there for someone because you want to, not because you want to be seen as a hero. The act of kindness in and of itself is what truly makes you a hero.

  • The Power of Introverts: Enhanced Thinking, Empathy, and Therapeutic Potential

    The Power of Introverts: Enhanced Thinking, Empathy, and Therapeutic Potential

    Introverts have often been misunderstood and underestimated in a world that values extroverted qualities. However, recent research suggests that introverts possess unique strengths that make them exceptional thinkers, empathizers, and potential therapists. In this article, we will explore how introverts’ inherent traits contribute to their ability to think deeply, empathize genuinely, and excel in the field of therapy.

    Introverts thrive in solitude and introspection, which allows them to engage in deep thinking and reflection. Their preference for quiet and contemplative environments enables them to focus and analyze information with great precision. Introverts possess an inclination for deep introspection, which encourages critical thinking and a profound understanding of complex concepts. This ability to think deeply enables them to approach problems from various angles, consider multiple perspectives, and arrive at insightful conclusions.

    Empathy is another remarkable trait commonly found in introverts. Their preference for observation and listening cultivates a heightened sense of empathy and understanding. Introverts are naturally attentive to the feelings and needs of others, making them skilled at recognizing and empathizing with different emotional states. They have a unique ability to connect with individuals on a deep emotional level, creating a safe and supportive space for others to express themselves.

    These inherent qualities make introverts well-suited for the field of therapy. The therapeutic process relies heavily on active listening, understanding, and creating a non-judgmental environment. Introverted therapists excel in these areas, as their natural inclination to listen deeply and observe attentively allows them to truly understand and empathize with their clients’ experiences. Their ability to connect on an emotional level helps establish trust and build strong therapeutic alliances.

    Introverted therapists often possess exceptional active listening skills, which are fundamental to effective therapy. They can create a safe and nurturing space for clients to express their thoughts and emotions without feeling rushed or judged. Introverts’ reflective nature allows them to carefully process and respond to clients’ concerns with thoughtfulness and empathy. This thoughtful approach fosters meaningful dialogue, helping clients gain insight, develop coping strategies, and work towards personal growth.

    Moreover, introverts’ preference for one-on-one interactions and their ability to focus deeply can be advantageous in therapy sessions. They are skilled at creating a calm and serene atmosphere where clients feel comfortable sharing their innermost thoughts and concerns. The introverted therapist’s ability to listen deeply, analyze information, and offer thoughtful responses promotes a productive therapeutic relationship.

    It’s important to recognize that not all introverts are automatically suited for the field of therapy, just as not all extroverts are automatically excluded. Introversion and extroversion exist on a spectrum, and individuals possess unique qualities and strengths regardless of their personality type. Therapy requires a diverse range of personalities and approaches to meet the varied needs of clients.

    In conclusion, introverts possess exceptional qualities that make them exceptional thinkers, empathizers, and potential therapists. Their deep-thinking abilities, genuine empathy, and preference for introspection contribute to their success in understanding and connecting with others. By embracing and valuing the unique strengths of introverts, we can appreciate the significant impact they can make as therapists and advocates for mental health.

  • The Quest for Happiness: A Heartfelt Letter

    The Quest for Happiness: A Heartfelt Letter

    Dear Happiness,

    Remember the times when we were young, wild and free? Those carefree days when we laughed until our stomachs ached, and the world was our playground. I want to take you down memory lane and revisit some of the happiest moments we shared together.

    Do you remember the night when we were both upset about being forced to sleep early for school? When we looked at the night bulb and said “Wow, everyone is asleep but I am still awake.” That moment made us feel like we were unstoppable. Even though we hadn’t done our homework, and we thought we would get in trouble the next day, the teacher didn’t show up. That day will always hold a special place in my heart, and I’ll never forget the joy we felt when we realized we had dodged a bullet.

    The excitement I felt playing with the strange objects I used to keep in a polybag still makes me smile. I could play with those cells, wires, batteries, and magnets for hours without getting tired. It was all thanks to you, and I still have some of those toys to this day.

    When we had to change cities and schools, we faced a lot of challenges, but you were always there with me. We made new friends, had fun and created memories that still make us laugh. And who can forget that night with our cousins, when we all danced together without a care in the world? That was a moment of pure joy, and I feel grateful to have shared it with you.

    College was a rollercoaster of emotions, but we got through it together. We found happiness in movies, computers, games, comics, and novels. And even when life got tough, you never left my side. I’ll always be grateful for the support of my family, friends, and of course, you.

    Do you remember our daily walks in Mumbai, the city that never sleeps? Those journeys on local trains and buses helped shape me into who I am today. I learned to cherish you even more during that time. I didn’t mind sacrificing sleep, or walking miles without getting tired because I was happy. And do you remember the time I met that creepy guy on the bus from Infinity Mall to Andheri Station? Although it was a strange encounter, it still brings a smile to my face.

    I also discovered that sharing you with others is a way to keep you around longer. I started talking to strangers on trains and buses and even gave pep talks to people who were going through tough times. It was a proud moment when I was able to bring positivity into someone’s life, even if it was just for a moment.

    Money may bring comfort and security, but it doesn’t bring happiness. I used to think that once I started earning a good salary, my life would be complete. But I was wrong. The happiness I felt eating a cheap Vada Pav and Limbu-paani can never be replaced by dining at fancy restaurants and eating expensive food.

    In conclusion, I want to say thank you for being there for me throughout the ups and downs of life. You have brought joy and happiness into my life, and I am forever grateful for your existence. I hope this letter takes you down memory lane and reminds you of all the amazing moments we have shared together.

    Yours always,

    Sachin

  • Too Much of a Good Thing: The Negative Side of Sacrificing for Others

    Too Much of a Good Thing: The Negative Side of Sacrificing for Others

    Hey there, kind and considerate person! You’re in the prime of your life and looking back, you’ve spent a lot of time and energy trying to make others happy. But, have you stopped to think if you’re actually doing them any good or yourself? It’s time to have a chat about why sacrificing too much for others might not be the best idea.

    First, let’s talk about the people you’re trying to help. They’re facing their own struggles in life – emotional, physical, psychological, or something else entirely. They’re doing their best to navigate through it all, but sometimes it gets overwhelming. That’s when you step in, thinking you’re the answer to their problems. But, hold up – you’re not the solution they need. They may want a change of scenery, a different perspective, or simply some rest. You’re not the answer they’re looking for, you’re just a temporary distraction.

    Think about it, if you hadn’t been there, something else would’ve filled that gap. Maybe a TV show, a song, or someone else entirely. By stepping in to “help”, you’re making yourself replaceable. It’s not making you a better person, it’s making you just another temporary distraction.

    And what about you? Do you think you’re helping others and becoming a better person in the process? Think again. By putting your own struggles aside to help someone else, you’re actually not doing yourself any favors. The people you’re trying to help will find a way to overcome their challenges, with or without you. They have their own resources and support systems – whether it be religion or just their own inner strength.

    It’s like you were playing a game of golf and saw another player struggling. Instead of continuing your own game, you dropped everything to be their caddie. But, what happens to your own game? The caddie’s role is temporary and replaceable. It doesn’t matter who’s carrying the clubs, the point is – you’re not playing your own game anymore.

    So, ask yourself – do you want to be a golf player or someone else’s temporary caddie? Don’t sacrifice your own happiness and well-being for others. You’re just as important as anyone else and deserve to focus on your own life and struggles. Don’t be a temporary distraction, be your own game changer.

  • The Power of Self-Love: How to Be Happy Alone and Just Be Awesome!

    The Power of Self-Love: How to Be Happy Alone and Just Be Awesome!

    Have you ever felt like you were all alone and had nobody to turn to? I know I have. I used to believe that the people I thought were there for me would always be there to support me, no matter what. But when I needed them the most, they weren’t there. And that’s when I realized that the world doesn’t work like that. The people we believe will be there for us may not always be there when we need them the most.

    But that’s okay. Because sometimes, being left alone is exactly what we need. It’s a wake-up call, a reality check that shows us that we can’t rely on others to make us happy. We have to do it ourselves. And that’s where self-love comes in.

    You see, when people say they like you, they’re talking about your outer appearance. They’re not interested in the real you, your inner soul. They’re just curious about your life and what makes you tick. And that’s why we have to stop relying on others for our happiness and start relying on ourselves.

    We have to learn to differentiate between what we really need and what we’ve just convinced ourselves that we need. We have to break the habit of seeking the company of others and start living our lives on our own. And once we do that, we’ll realize that we don’t need anyone else to do what we have to do. We’re capable of doing it ourselves.

    So, let go. Embrace your solitude. And make a promise to never let yourself be vulnerable again. The only person you can truly rely on is yourself. And once you start loving yourself, others will start to find you interesting again. They’ll be drawn to your confidence and independence. But be careful, because this is the same trap that you fell into in the first place. Focus on what you want, not on what others want from you.

    The lesson that life has taught me is that being alone isn’t a bad thing. It’s actually a powerful thing. When you learn to love and be happy with yourself, you become awesome. And you don’t have to be someone else to achieve that. You just have to be yourself. So, go ahead and be awesome!

  • The Price of Love: What it Takes to Make an Indian Marriage Work

    The Price of Love: What it Takes to Make an Indian Marriage Work

    Marriage is a beautiful journey filled with love, laughter, and compromise. Whether it’s a love marriage or an arranged one, once you get hitched, you are in for a wild ride. Some of the sacrifices you may have to make might not be easy, but they are necessary to keep the marriage going strong. In this article, we’ll take a look at eight common sacrifices that Indians make after getting married.

    Letting go of passions

    In our pre-marriage days, we all have something that we are passionate about – be it travel, sports, adventure, or collecting things. But after getting married, many of us feel the need to let go of our passions to settle down with our significant other.

    Eating habits

    Food is a big deal in any marriage. You may have to adjust your eating habits to accommodate your partner’s preferences. For example, if you are a non-vegetarian and your partner is a vegetarian, you may have to give up your favorite meat dishes. If you are a north Indian and your partner is from the south, you may have to adjust your diet to suit both of your palates.

    Fashion sense

    Your fashion sense may change after you get married, especially for women. You may feel the need to switch from a more casual style to a more formal and modest one. Observe your married friends, and you’ll notice the difference in the way they dress after tying the knot.

    Spending habits

    Gone are the days of splurging on expensive bikes or clothes without a second thought. After getting married, you may feel financially insecure, and it becomes important to prioritize your expenses according to your income. This means cutting back on frivolous spending to save for the future.

    Friendships

    Maintaining friendships after marriage can be challenging. Your priorities change, and you may have to put your partner first. You can still hang out with your old buddies, but you can’t be in constant contact with them every weekend. Making your partner your top priority is a sacrifice you may have to make for your marriage to work.

    Ex-partners

    Staying in touch with exes after a breakup can cause tension in your marriage. It’s best to cut ties with them and avoid any potential complications.

    Affinity to family

    It’s important to maintain a good relationship with your parents and siblings, but once you get married, your spouse takes precedence. You may have to make the sacrifice of giving them less time and attention to make room for your partner in your life.

    Daily habits

    Finally, you may have to change your daily habits to accommodate your partner. This includes cleaning up after yourself, not wearing the same clothes for a week, and being a responsible partner.

    Making sacrifices for your marriage may seem daunting, but it’s all worth it in the end. A strong and loving marriage is a beautiful thing, and the sacrifices you make will only make it stronger. So, embrace the changes, compromise, and enjoy the journey.

  • The Dark Side of Emotions: How “Hurt” Sentiments Fuel Injustice and Division

    The Dark Side of Emotions: How “Hurt” Sentiments Fuel Injustice and Division

    As Indians, we often judge people and things based on appearances alone, without fully understanding the situation. Our brains are wired to make quick conclusions. But when it comes to caste or religion, our perceptions can change in a dramatic way. We may suddenly feel compelled to defend our own caste or religion, even if we are not directly involved. This can lead to taking things personally and not being able to let go until the situation subsides.

    Recently, there were incidents in the state of Haryana involving the blocking of roads and railways, aggressive attacks causing damage to public property, theft from ATMs, and the setting of shops and malls on fire, all in response to the “Jat Agitation” demand for reservation. The national media was covering these events extensively.

    I wrote a Facebook post condemning the incidents and the demand for reservation by the Jats, who are known for being royal and rich, but are neither socially nor economically backward. To my surprise, some of my Facebook friends who are Jats started defending and justifying the protests. One of them even called me to ask if I was following a politician who was speaking out against the demand for reservation. I told them that I don’t have to follow anyone to see that what was happening was wrong and to speak out against it.

    What was interesting was that these friends who were defending the riots were not even participating in the protests. Some of them had previously spoken out against the idea of reservation. But now that their caste was demanding reservation, they suddenly had a change of heart.

    There were a few who spoke out against the riots, regardless of their caste, but the majority of people criticized them for bringing shame to their caste, as if the agitators weren’t already doing that. It’s difficult to understand how anyone could justify blocking a road, let alone the more aggressive acts that took place, just to demand reservation for one caste. It causes inconvenience to innocent people who have no part in this reservation controversy.

    Why is it that our caste or religion is more important to us than humanity and the greater good of people? I can’t help but wonder what would happen if people from ISIS or other terrorist organizations were of the same caste as my friends. They would likely cry every time a terrorist was hanged by the law and protest against it, just like they did for the reservation.

    This is why politicians are able to win elections through their dirty politics of caste and religion. It’s our emotional attachment to our caste or religion that is the biggest obstacle to our country’s development. We are the biggest fools in this conspiracy to keep people divided by caste and religion, but one thing is for sure – we won’t change.

  • My Childhood Excuse That Became a Running Joke

    My Childhood Excuse That Became a Running Joke

    Growing up in 2006, my friend Vinesh (or Vinna, as we liked to call him) and I were two young and carefree teenagers who just wanted to enjoy life. Our 12th board exams were fast approaching, and we had to attend Math tuition every day to improve our weakest subject. Our ride was a daily 4 km bicycle journey from our homes to the tuition center.

    Our parents were strict, always reminding us that we had to study hard for the board exams. But for us, being stuck inside with books felt like a prison sentence. So, whenever we could, we would leave home early and return late, just to spend more time outside of the house. We lived in neighboring areas, so our daily commute was always a joint one.

    On the way back home, we would pass by a railway crossing that was often closed to vehicles due to the high frequency of trains on that route. However, being impatient young Indians, we would cross it on our bicycles without any trouble. We would even stop our bikes at the crossing and watch the trains go by, debating on their estimated speeds. Sometimes, we would wait for one or two more trains to pass, just so we could extend our discussions a little longer.

    One day, we got carried away and were so late getting back home that it was already dark. When my parents asked why I was late, I quickly came up with the first excuse that popped into my head: “The railway crossing post was closed for too long. Even between the trains, they didn’t open it. That’s why I am so late.”

    To my surprise, my parents seemed to believe me. The next day, I told Vinna about my clever excuse and how I had managed to avoid trouble. But before I could finish my story, he pointed out the obvious flaw: “We were on bicycles, you idiot. We could have crossed the post even if it had been closed for real. Why would we just wait and watch the trains?”

    I was stunned by my own stupidity and couldn’t believe that my parents hadn’t noticed the flaw in my excuse. Vinna and I laughed and laughed about my foolishness until our stomachs ached. To this day, whenever we talk about that incident, we can’t help but laugh.

    Those really were the days! A time when we were carefree, fearless, and just enjoying the ride. I will always cherish the memories of that time, and the running joke that was born from my childhood excuse.

  • Finding Innocence in a Cynical World: Why It Matters

    Finding Innocence in a Cynical World: Why It Matters

    I was on my way to a work meeting and had some time to kill, so I decided to stand on the side of the road and people watch. As I was standing there, I couldn’t help but think about all the meetings I’ve had that haven’t gone as well as I’d hoped. I was feeling pretty cynical and not too confident about the meeting I was about to have.

    But then something funny happened. A little girl, probably around 7 or 8 years old, appeared next to me. She looked worried and confused. I ignored her at first, but then she touched my hand and asked if I saw anything. I looked where she was pointing and saw that a bird had pooped on her shoulder. I couldn’t help but laugh, and the little girl looked embarrassed.

    She asked me to clean it off with water from her bottle, which I did. But it didn’t really do the trick. She looked worried again and asked how she was going to clean it. I suggested using a piece of paper, but she said her teacher would get mad if she tore something out of her notebook. So, I looked around and found an empty medicine box and tore off a piece of hard paper from it. I cleaned her shoulder and she thanked me before running off to meet her mom.

    That little interaction made me feel so much better. It was a reminder that even in a cynical world, a little bit of innocence can go a long way. And as a result, I walked into that meeting feeling more in control and positive. And it went really well. So, thanks little girl for reminding me to keep things in perspective.

    It’s easy to get caught up in the cynicism of the world, especially when it comes to work and meeting new people. But sometimes, all it takes is a small moment of innocence to remind us that there’s still good in the world and that we should never lose hope.

    In this case, it was a small schoolgirl who reminded me of this. Her innocence made me realize that I was taking everything too seriously. It was a small moment, but it had a big impact on my day.

    It’s important to remember that these moments of innocence can be found anywhere and at any time. Sometimes, all it takes is a small change in perspective to see them. And when we do, it can completely change our mood and outlook on life.

    So the next time you’re feeling cynical and down, try to find a moment of innocence in your day. It might just be the thing that brings a smile to your face and helps you see the world in a different light. And who knows, it might even make your meeting or your day go a little better.

  • The Truth About Love: 6 Cultural Misconceptions

    The Truth About Love: 6 Cultural Misconceptions

    Love is a beautiful thing, but it can also be complicated. There are many cultural misconceptions about love that can lead to unrealistic expectations and disappointment. These misconceptions can come from movies, TV shows, books, and even our own families and friends. It’s important to understand these misconceptions so that you can have a more realistic view of love and relationships.

    1. The Myth of Automatically Finding “The One”

    One of the most common myths about love is the existence of “the one” for everyone. This is a myth that can be harmful to relationships because it creates unrealistic expectations. People often believe that they will immediately know when they meet “the one” who is going to be their soulmate. While it is possible to feel an instant attraction to someone, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they are the right person for you. Attraction is usually just sexual or romantic in nature and choosing a life partner is much more complex than just feeling romantic about someone.

    To truly know if someone is right for you, you need to get to know them on a deeper level. You need to understand their values, goals, and personality. You need to see how they interact with your family and friends. You need to see how they handle difficult situations and if they have the strength of character to go the distance with you.

    In addition, it’s important to understand that nobody is perfect. Even if you find someone who seems to be perfect for you, they will have flaws and imperfections just like everyone else. It’s important to accept and love them for who they are, warts and all.

    2. The Myth of “Meant To Be”

    Another common myth about love is that it is something that brings two people together who are “meant to be” together. This is not true. Love is a mutual decision between two people. It takes a lot of effort and compromise to make it work. The myth of “meant to be” can create the idea that if two people are meant to be together, every problem that arises will be easily resolved. This is not the case in real life. Research shows that 67% of conflicts between couples do not get resolved. Problems need to be addressed and worked through in

    order to make a relationship successful. It’s important to understand that love takes work and it’s not always easy.

    3. The Myth of Immediate Familiarity

    Another myth is that if you feel like you have known someone for a long time, even if you’re meeting them for the first time, they must be the one for you. This is not always the case. Sometimes people just have a lot in common and it can create a sense of familiarity, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they are the one for you. It’s important to take the time to get to know someone before jumping to conclusions about a potential relationship.

    4. The Myth of the Love Story in Movies

    Movies and TV shows often depict love as a fairy tale with a happy ending. They show us a dreamy picture of love that can create unrealistic expectations. In reality, love is not always easy and it’s important to understand that the love stories in movies are not always reflective of real life.

    5. The Myth of Love Being All Butterflies and Rainbows

    Love is a wonderful thing, but it’s not always butterflies and rainbows. There will be tough times and challenges to overcome. It’s important to understand that love takes work and it’s not always easy. But if you’re willing to put in the effort, it can be amazing.

    6. The Myth of Love Should Be Easy

    Love takes work, but it’s worth it. It’s not always easy, but if you’re willing to put in the effort, it can be amazing.

    It’s important to understand that love is a journey, not a destination. Have realistic expectations and understand that love takes work. Everyone’s journey with love is different and unique. Love is a complex and nuanced thing so approach it with an open mind and a willingness to learn and grow.

    Always remember that you are in charge of your own happiness and well-being. You can’t rely on someone else to fulfill all your emotional needs. Have a sense of self-worth and independence.

    You need to understand that not everyone will have the same experience of love or that everyone will have the same definition of love. Everyone is different and it’s important to respect and honor that.

    Having realistic expectations can help you navigate the complexities of relationships and find the love that is right for you.