– easier said than done.
Seeking people’s validation on various aspects of your life is something often frowned upon but only when discussing the concept, because everybody does so to some extent.
Introverts are generally less prone because of their need for lack of exposure.
But…
It’s not practical to teach someone who has built a mansion with their hard-earned money for the purpose of impressing their peers.
Moreover, it’s not just a choice, it’s a value system one builds their life upon.
How can you let go of something you’ve always believed in?
Your childhood dreams revolve around getting an “awe” from random people.
You want to show your parents that you’re better than that studious kid they wanted you to take inspiration from.
And you want to prove to your ex what a big mistake it was dumping you.
There’s too much baggage to simply forget about all this and start not caring about anyone’s opinion.
But what makes doing so the most difficult is the hard truth that if you’ve nobody to impress, you have nothing else to work for.
You might consider renunciation of all material things and be the modern Buddha.
Wait, it actually makes sense.
Because Buddha did so to find the purpose of life, and this is exactly what you’re missing – a purpose that relates more to your fulfilment regardless of how the world sees you.
You’re looking at doing a bit of reverse engineering on your psyche and figure out what really gives you that sense of fulfilment.
Is it the praise you get from your friends for humming a popular song occasionally
or is it to pursue your childhood dream of being a professional singer?
Is it the pat on the back you get from your boss for being articulate in your emails to clients
or is it finishing that draft of a fiction novel you started writing during college?
Is it always owning the latest iPhone or is it living phone-free on weekends so you can own your me time?
Once you realize the core elements that offer you true fulfilment
and deal with your insecurities of not being able to prove to the world what you’re worth,
you can start building a life whose sole point is aligning with your needs and values.
And the deeper you go the less you feel the need for validation.
It’s like deaddiction from the high you get in cheers and addiction to appreciating what means the most to you.
And just like getting sober, it’s a slow process but worth it.
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